First Day Back

Wow, I never realized what a month off would do to me. I wasn't able to fall asleep so easily last night and that did not help this morning. I had planned on sleeping early and waking up at 6:30 so I can get a little workout in before getting ready to leave. I woke up at 7 and considering that I have to clean up the house a little and get ready to leave by 8, this was not a good thing. I didn't feel rushed or anything, just a groggy and out of it. The fact that I had to make my schedule from 8:30 to 3 with only a 25 min break is going to kill me.

Also there are the teachers that just like to talk about themselves for 2 hours. Yes, that is what I went through this morning. She hardly mentioned Earth Science, which you know would make sense considering that is the class. The only time I got to say anything was when I attempted to correct my name while she butchered it taking attendance. This happens to be a reoccurring theme throughout my classes. I guess it is something I will have to live with.

My English class, which I'm not officially in, was alright. I took the teacher last year and decided to stick with her. Unfortunately, there are 11 people on the waitlist and she can't let that many people in. Hopefully I will be one of them. Class timings otherwise are just completely awful.

Now, my Math class was probably the most awful part of my day. Our teacher is a complete....well I don't know the proper word for him just yet. He hasn't taught in four years, so that says something about his teaching skills I guess. On top of that, he has never taught an elementary class, so I don't know how he is going to be able to help prepare us. He is one of those teachers that starts a lesson and every couple of minutes something reminds him and he begins to trail off into a story or something of the sort.

Overall it wasn't a bad day considering I was on three hours of sleep. What really made my day was that somehow, my luck, a seat opened up in that Physics class I needed to get into. So I am excited to start that tomorrow. Hopefully it won't be too bad of a semester.

WB Final Update

Well, my winter break is pretty much over now. I will definitely miss the downtime, but I am excited to get myself busy with something. I haven't been up to much really, just trying to reorganize my room. I managed to finish my closet, throwing out unnecessary things and throwing out my sisters' things that have been in there for far too long. If they want it they can come and get it, otherwise it is not my problem.

Anyway, I am working on my shelves and desk now and it is not as easy to organize. I realized that I have a lot of stuff. So, I am going to try to do a bunch DIY projects and find little things that will help keep me organized. I am also going to try and do it on a budget. I want to keep it to $50 but I feel like that would too little. I am trying to save money right because I will be hopefully attending university and that is going to cost a pretty penny. I think Target will definitely be one of my first stops. It has that dollar section and there are always other really nice things in the room area and all over the store. Its going to take a bit of effort to do, but it isn't impossible. It is a fun little project for my last weekend of nothing to do.

As for my reading, it has slowed down a bit on all three. I am kind of more into movies at the moment. Netflix has a good collection of classic movies I watched as a kid and I was excited to watch them all. I would definitely recommend rewatching them all, and if you have children then I am sure that they will love all of them as well. It is just a good blast from the past I guess.

Now, I have a bucketlist and I am debating whether or not I should put it up. I want to because I want to add one more thing to my "Goals for the 2013". I want to complete at least 5 things off of it. I have crossed off one thing and that makes me pretty happy. Let me know if you are interested in seeing it or if you have things that you think I should add onto it. I am always open for suggestions.

Oh and before I forget, everyone please pray that I get into this Physics class that I need. I won't be able to graduate this year without it!

Friends, the Best of 'em

You will hear a million different definitions to what the word 'friend' means. According to Wikipedia it is:

Noun A person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations.

If you ask me, a friend is someone you can hang out with and have a good time. In my case, there really is no difference between a friend and an acquaintance. Because of school and my complete lack of social skills, I don't get out much to hangout with all the people that I know. I don't know much about them and they don't know much about you. So you see, that is why there really is no difference to me. 

Now, a best friend is something far greater. Once you get one, or more, you feel like they re the people you can talk to no matter what, act a fool around, and know that they won't silently judge you like a friend will. You are able to speak your mind around them, and if you hate someone odds are they will hate them too just because. Whenever you feel low they are the ones that can bring you back to life and completely turn your day around. I'm not saying it is a perfect relationship. Like much else there will be problems, things that will send you spiraling and drive you mad. In the end of the day though, you both will get over it and go back to whatever way you were. 

Unfortunately, when you get older, you sometimes have a falling out with some of the people you care most about. After my accident in the beginning of summer '12, I began to push people away. I was like that during the first three years of high school. I never let anyone in, I never told anyone anything  and I was basically a very closed and private person. I bloomed my senior year and I swore that I would not lose my 2 best friends. I had never anticipated what college does to you, and then the traumatic event that was to come for me. 

During my freshman year of college, I took things very easily and maintained a friendship with my best friends, running into one of them at school and the other through texting and hanging out every now and then, as well as making new friends. My sophomore year in college, now, I know what I am majoring and I am putting all my focus into school so that I can finish with my associates degree by the end of the year. This has killed my social life completely. Also with my accident, I came to the realization that I had to set my priorities straight and school was at the top of the list. 

I somehow managed to fall right back into that part of my life where I wanted no one close to me. I am a very honest person and keep no secrets, an open book, but I still feel like I need to keep to myself. I went through it when I was younger, and I guess history does repeat itself. I am also bad at keeping things going with people. It is never some major fight or anything, it is usually just a natural fallout. I guess maybe I am destined for a hermit's life and that is all I have to look forward to, I hope that isn't the case though.

To my best friends who I had this fallout with, you know who you are and I am truly sorry. I never intended that to happen. I want us to get back together again and have a strong relationship, but we all live separate lives. Somehow things just happen like that. It really breaks my heart and I would never wish this empty feeling on anyone because there are times when I need to talk to someone and I realize I have no one. This is no one's fault but my own. 

WB Update and Other Things

Well my winter break is moving along nicely. As much as I dislike school I am actually anxious for the next semester. I really don't like not having anything to do. Anyway, the new year started and I am ready to embrace it! It feels like it is going to be a good year, although once I'm in school and freaking out over that I will probably change my mind. Then again, now that I have gotten rid of my old HP laptop, our time together was short lived but great nonetheless, and got myself a new Samsung Chromebook it is good so far! It was a sort of a little birthday gift to myself because I turn 20 on the 27th!! I love my birthday month and until that day I will be reminding everyone I know.

Anyway, seeing as it is the new year, it is time for some resolutions or goals for myself. I know people really hate them and I didn't realize that I know a lot of cynics until I read all their opinions on the matter. Regardless of what others think, I am setting these goals for myself and I will stick with them throughout the year. I will have no choice because I will be writing updates monthly so that I can keep track of my progress and so will you.

1. Get fit. This is a resolution that many people decide to go with, and well I am one of those people. I am going to make it specific though. I want to lose 15 pounds by June and almost completely cut out sweets and unnecessary foods. I'm not to sure about the sweets, but I will definitely try.

2. Post at least 3 times a month. One post will be dedicated to my goal updates, another will be miscellaneous, and the last will be a current reads update. The current reads one will be so that I make sure that I continue reading because I sometimes lose focus when I start school and I don't want that to happen. So basically, it is a goal within a goal!

3. Lastly, I want to have a more positive outlook on life. The phrase "misery loves company" always rings true to me. Somehow I always manage to surround myself with negative energy, and it isn't healthy. Bad habits form from this negativity and that will throw off my first goal.

So those are the 3 things I hope to keep up with throughout this year. People say that it is just another year and that no one really changes, but may I just say that I am not the person I was in the beginning of 2012. Are all my changes for the better? Maybe, maybe not, it really depends who you are asking. Everyone is going to have an opinion and it is up to you whether you choose to listen and act upon those opinions.

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On a side note, I also hope to be graduating with my associates degree this year! That is definitely my top priority above all else! Have a great year everyone!!

New Year, New You!...Not Really

So the new year sort of just creeped up. Another year has come to an end. For me specifically I don't think much has happened. The only notable thing I think is that I managed to finally choose a major and not change my mind after a week or two like before. To my family however, there has been a lot!

We welcomed three babies into the world this year. A boy and two girls, and although I have yet to go see one of the girls, I love them with all my heart. I wanted to go see the new baby down in Florida seeing as I have another two weeks of break, but I cannot get myself to leave the other two. Other things happened as well, but nothing that seems as notable as just that news.

Well some of us managed to make it out of 2012 without too much damage, and I think that is something we should give ourselves credit for. We will all have our new years resolution, that we will all most likely give up by the second week of January. Even if that is true, I think that everyone should have one just because you never know the outcome of it. If you say that you are going to workout and be healthy (a very common one!), you may meet someone at the gym or at a wholefoods that could help you keep up with your resolution. If you say you want to be more outgoing, all you need is to meet one person before you give up, and who knows where that will lead. These little goals that we set for ourselves, no matter how foolish or impractical, are a driving force for some change. Change is a good thing even if it not always welcome.

New year, so why not make it a new you? I'm not saying to change who you are because you may be a great person. I am saying that you should open yourself up to new things that you may not have tried or liked before. Over time we become different people whether we choose to or not, so why don't we just embrace these little changes and own them. Some people may not like the new you, but as long as you are happy, what does it matter what others think of you?